What to do when you get the rejection blues 🙁

Today's guest is author Larissa Pham

In publishing, hearing “no” is guaranteed.

A writer’s curse is that you will hear “no” far more than you’ll hear a “yes.” That doesn’t mean you can’t write. That doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong. That doesn’t mean your publishing dreams will fail.

It just means you’re in the game.

So write for yourself, always.

Who are you writing for, really? No, it’s not that literary agent who rejected you in 2020 and you’ll likely never correspond with again.

Write for yourself first.

Because if you’re happy with your writing, it becomes way easier to deal with rejection and wait for the right agent and editor who feels just as passionately about your book.

In today’s interview, author Larissa Pham teaches us how to deal with and accept rejection, how to revise without getting stuck and her unusual tactic to take when she needs to take a break from her writing.

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OUR SPECIAL GUEST TODAY IS…

Larissa Pham

Author

Debut novel available now: DISCIPLINE

What’s a myth about publishing or being an author that you wish more people understood?

That one day, if you just get everything you want—the dream agent, the book deal, the big prize—finally you’ll be happy. No—like many other things in life, it becomes so easy to take things for granted, and then you keep wanting more, like: Why didn’t my book get optioned? Why didn’t I get that fellowship?

But that path only leads to suffering. I think you’ve got to write for yourself first, for the love of the craft. Everything else can come after that.

What’s one thing about the publishing process no one tells you, but should?

Rejection isn’t an anomaly, it’s part of the process. At every stage of the publishing process, at every stage of a writer’s career, you will face rejection. We don’t often talk about rejection because it stings, but it’s completely normal!

You don’t need a dozen editors or agents clamoring for your book; you just need one person who completely believes in you and your project. My first book, the essay collection POP SONG, received over a dozen passes before finding the perfect editor.

When I queried my novel, DISCIPLINE, I thought it’d be easy with a book already out—but I still received plenty of no’s before I connected with my eventual agent, whom I adore working with.

And having feedback from agents who passed on the manuscript helped me prepare for the submission process! Getting a “no” doesn’t mean you should give up writing or that you’re doomed to fail—it’s just another source of information to learn and grow from.

What is the most memorable writing tip or technique that you have heard, and how did it influence your process?

I am fairly certain I got this advice from a newsletter of Alexander Chee’s, and I will paraphrase, but essentially: When you first sit down to write, don’t go back and look at what you wrote the day before—you’ll just start editing and won’t write anything new. Instead, start your writing session fresh at the very bottom of the manuscript, and save editing for later on, once you’re a little tired.

I am a chronic editor—I revise most of my work as the draft goes along—so taking this advice really helped me not get stuck in a perfectionist loop.

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Ready for feedback that takes your story to the next level?

“Because of Alyssa’s feedback on my query letter, I was able to obtain a reputable agent who then sold my book to a top 5 publisher! When I needed help choosing an editor, she was there to chime in and offer guidance! And even eleven months later when I asked for insight choosing an imprint, she helped then, too!”

—Bailey Evers, contemporary romance author

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What’s one thing you do (creatively, mentally, or physically) that helps you stay in it when writing gets hard?

This is probably really strange, but for both of my books I’d take breaks to do planks in my office while writing. It wasn’t that I *wanted* to be doing all that, but it was more of an uncontrollable urge—and it helped me stay focused and helped channel the excess, nervous energy I’d feel sometimes. Movement is important! I’ve also found going on long walks to be really helpful when I feel stuck on a project.

What part of the writing process brings you the most joy?

The writing itself! I love writing and I love spending time with words. I feel fantastically lucky that I get to write. The most exciting part of the process is when I’m deep in a project and everything I encounter seems to refract back to it in some way—when I feel fully in the world of the book.

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ICYMI…last week on YouTube, I shared some candid writing motivation that got me to “the end” of my own book.